If Only You Knew
by struckbykurtsie
Summary: Blaine Anderson is the most popular guy at McKinley High. He is the golden boy who everyone wants to be. Outcasted Kurt Hummel is about to join the list of Blaine's secret admirers, but Kurt's crush has to stay a secret forever for the sake of his own safety.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

At every school there is always that popular guy who everyone wants to be; who every other girl dreams of having a passionate relationship with. All the other guys are either incredibly jealous of them, or desperately want to be them. The enormous, chattering crowds of teenagers thought that their high school hero could do no wrong, even if they acted like a total asshole towards them. Every single has this sort of person.

The person in this school, was named Blaine Anderson.

* * *

Underneath the dreamy popular guys in the high school pool lies the outcasts. The types if people who dread arriving to school each day because of the awful treatment they experience. These types of people aspire to be as big and as popular as everyone else someday. But unfortunately, the vast majority won't get their chance. They are practically glued to the loser lunch table. There are a lot more underdogs than big-headed popular guys in most schools.

But the most miserable and most bullied person was called Kurt Hummel.

* * *

"What's up, lady boy?" was the question that was shouted at Kurt every single day. Everyone simply responded by laughing until they cried, like these bullies had just told the funniest joke in the world.

Kurt's reaction, however, was to slowly walk away.

His attackers nearly always replied with, "Hey! Don't walk away while I'm talking to you, Hummel!"

Kurt sighed, "I'm usually a very polite person, I don't usually ignore people when they're talking to me. But you," he said, standing closer to his bullies, "Aren't taliking to me, not properly. So you can watch me walk away now."

Kurt swiftly turned around, only to be shoved against a locker and laughed at.

"Don't you get funny with me, Hummel. Don't forget: we know people and you don't. There's tons of people at this school who want that pretty little face of yours kicked in, and we know people who could quite easily do it," Kurt could feel Karofsky's breath tickle his face.

Kurt gulped, mumbled something inaudible and hurried down the hallway. He could say a million things about Karofsky. About him, not to him. Kurt wasn't stupid, far from it. He knew just what Karofsky and the bad boy gang were capable of.

The only times where Kurt was genuinely happy was when he was at glee club. The New Directions members treated him as a friend, not as a victim. Kurt did not want to be treated as a victim, under any circumstances. Because to be treated as a victim, meant that you were weak, and Kurt refused to believe that that was what he was.

Kurt walked into the choir room, looking absolutely terrified. He must have looked that way because even Rachel looked concerned, and the only time she ever showed any emotion was when she was singing.

Kurt managed to ignore these glances and sat down on a plastic chair, he struggled to concentrate on anything happening because McKinley's high school dreamboat was standing just outside the choir room. He looked into those brown-coloured eyes but quickly turned away because falling for this guy was not going to get him into the school's most popular list anytime soon.

"Are you okay, Kurt? You seem...distracted," Mercedes gently asked him as she patted his pale hands.

No words came out of Kurt's mouth. The only reaction Mercedes managed to receive was an off-hand nod of his head.

Mercedes turned her head so that she could see Kurt's beautiful sea-green coloured eyes. She saw that his pupils were steady and that he was staring at the doorway. She turned her face and just caught the unmistakable black hair that so obviously belonged to the one and only Blaine Anderson.

She managed to keep her mouth shut during the glee club session so that no embarrassment would be caused. But as soon as the hallways were cleared and not one New Directions member was in sight, Mercedes gave her opinion quite clearly.

"By any chance, do you have a crush on Blaine Anderson?"

Kurt's eyes opened wide, he tried his very best to act innocent, "What? B-Blaine Anderson? No, no, no, no, no. Having a crush on him, that's practically...suicide."

"Are you scared?" Mercedes asked, looking concerned, "I mean, Blaine is the most popular guy in this school, maybe even outside of it. I understand, Kurt. It's okay if you have crushes on people you have absolutely no chance with. Believe me, I know what it feels like."

"Well that sucks for you, but I however, do not understand a thing you are going through because I do not, have a crush on Blaine Anderson," Kurt said, he smiled just to show that he didn't care.

"Okay then," Mercedes sighed, smiled back and left without uttering another word. She left Kurt with a raised eyebrow.

* * *

"How was school today, son?" Burt asked as soon as Kurt stepped inside the house.

Kurt gave his dad a not-so-accurate account of his school day, minus his ordeal with Karofsky and added unnecessary details about what was happening at glee club. This sort of information wasn't very surprising and was the same type of thing Kurt shared with his dad every day, but Burt smiled and listened carefully as if his son was spinning him a brand new tale.

The only thing Kurt was spinning was lies.

"Dad. Dad, did you ever have a crush on someone when you we're my age?" Kurt boldly asked him.

Burt laughed, "Quite a few times. Although crushes are never really that special. High school relationships never last, everyone gets their heart broken one way or another."

Kurt could see tears building up in his father's eyes and didn't want to continue their conversation but couldn't bring himself to end it, "How would someone tell their crush that they're, you know, into them?"

"I just told them outright. What's brought this on? Do you like someone at school now? Who is it?" Burt started bombarding his son with questions that Kurt wasn't really comfortable answering.

_Blaine Anderson, Dad, Blaine Anderson, _Kurt thought. Without the possibility of ever being able to say it out loud.

Underdog Kurt Hummel had developed a huge crush on top-dog Blaine Anderson.

* * *

**Reviews/opinions? I'm curious to know what you all think :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Sorry for the late update, I completely forgot about this. Anyway, hope you enjoy this chapter :)**

* * *

**Chapter 2**

To say Blaine Anderson was completely oblivious about the attention he got everyday would be a downright lie. He loved every single bit of it. Even the stereotype that all the popular guys at McKinley were jerks didn't get to him, because he knew for a fact that that wasn't true. Blaine wanted to treat everyone he came into contact with the respect they may or may not deserve. He was one of the few popular people who didn't act like a total asshole. Well, not as much of an asshole as the others were. In a way, he was like an endangered species.

However, his good attitude didn't go rewarded. Blaine's high school crowd wasn't as friendly as he was and poor Blaine was often pulled down to their level. The group he was stuck with went on daily slushie sessions which involved pouncing on the weak, terrorising them and drowning people in coloured ice. Each day a different colour.

"Hey, Anderson!" Blaine heard Karofsky's booming voice shout his name.

Blaine was handed a cup filled to the brim with slush. The other guys winked at him in unison and Blaine sighed. Blaine wasn't cut out to be a bully. He hadn't exactly experienced any sort of bullying that could affect him, physically or mentally, but deep down he knew that it was wrong. Blaine held the cup firmly in his hand and waited for their upcoming slushie victim to be announced.

"So," one guy started, dragging out his words, "Whose turn is it now?"

"Haven't we done this to like, every kid in this school? We do this every day. Who could we have missed?" another asked.

"Hey, guys," Puck spoke in a loud whisper, "There's a few losers in here. I don't ever recall giving these guys a hard time," he pointed to the choir room door.

"I'm pretty sure we have, Puckerman. I mean, doesn't torturing the same old people get boring after a while?" Blaine tried his best to distract everyone's attention away from the choir room, he failed miserably.

"Who cares, Anderson?" Puck smiled at him, "They're all the same person, really. And when does watching people squeal in pain get dull? Never! So are we going to go in there or are we just going to dither about drawing breath?"

Blaine drew breath even more then, as he and the others ran inside to greet the petrified faces who would soon be their next victims.

"Good morning, gay club!" Karofsky cheered and the others shouted the same silly phrase after him like parrots.

Finn bravely stood up, and walked dangerously close up to Karofsky, "Get the hell out of here, Karofsky!"

Karofsky's only reaction was to laugh before _splash_! The spotless, flawless face that belonged to Finn Hudson was covered in a freezing cold red liquid. One by one, every single glee club member would suffer the same fate at the hands of these bullies.

Soon enough, the only cups that were left unemptied were the cups that belonged to Blaine and Puck. Likewise, the remaining clean faces were those of Santana Lopez and Kurt Hummel.

Blaine first looked at Santana's features, then he slowly turned towards Kurt. Blaine took a few steps towards Santana, gripping the cup tightly. He was just a few seconds away from spilling the coloured ice on Santana's head before quickly turning and throwing the slushie directionally in Kurt's way.

Puckerman, obviously thinking Blaine was torturing these idiots in a creative way, followed his lead and emptied the contents of his cup all over Santana. He high-fived Blaine, cheered, then left with the others without another word being uttered. Blaine looked behind him and stared back at the glee club. No words actually escaped his mouth, but his mouth attempted to whisper the words "I'm sorry". As if saying the S-word would actually fix anything. But still, he had hoped it would.

He hoped for the best but expected the worst. Maybe he was as bad as the stereotypes often said.

Blaine felt like an asshole and that horrible feeling stuck with him throughout the entire day. He tried to seem carefree and mean and like a bully just like the rest of the group, but he was pretty sure that he wasn't fooling anyone.

Boy, was he ever wrong.

"Creative way to drench those glee club losers, Blaine," one congratulated him.

"We should do that again," another joined in.

"No," Karofsky argued. "It was a great idea to do that Blaine, but doing the same thing over and over again. It just gets boring, doesn't it?"

Blaine didn't want to point out that bullying every single person in school wasn't particularly very interesting, but that's what he truthfully thought. He could never speak that thought out loud. Not without his entire high school life crashing down around him. And it wasn't really worth losing his built-up reputation.

Blaine had a strong sense of what's right and wrong, even if he didn't act on that knowledge often. He wanted to show the glee club that, contrary to popular opinion, he was actually a fairly nice guy. He built up the courage and slowly approached the choir room. He raised his clenched fist and knocked on the door, so gently no one inside could him hear him. The door opened and all eyes were on Blaine, his face was apologetic but he was still unable to look the glee club members in the eye properly.

Blaine had just opened his mouth slightly and was just about to start speaking when Puckerman had caught him from down the hallway.

"What are you doing here, Anderson?"

"I was just, I, um. I was just, just checking up on our little glee club chums," Blaine said with a grin.

"Oh, okay then," Puck sighed. "You know what, the glee club is full of losers, but those Cheerios in there. I don't mind them."

Blaine smiled, "I know what you mean. Don't tell the others, but I really like Santana. I have for a while."

Puck nodded, agreeing with him, "I don't blame you, I prefer Quinn though," Puck looked in the three girls' direction.

Kurt, who had been eavesdropping on the pairs' conversation looked hopefully at the two bullies, then at the Cheerios, then back to Blaine and Puck. His high school crush on Blaine never stood a chance. The pair were at opposite ends of the high school food chain and Blaine was a known heterosexual.

Kurt rested his cheek on the palm of his hand and stared dreamily at Blaine, making the gleam in his eye as obvious as possible. So obvious that Blaine noticed and looked into those green eyes an odd way. That glance could have meant just about anything.

Kurt and Blaine were just as confused as each other.

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